To Homeschool or Not To Homeschool...

To homeschool or not to homeschool is a pretty big question.  A HUGE question actually.  Or, rather, the decision is HUGE (though the question is lingering enough to make it pretty huge also).
I put lots of thought & tons of prayer (and even a smidge of research) into my answer of this question.  Then I asked Kman his opinion & it brought me right back to square one. /sigh/
Before you even say them, I am well aware of the following things & have put much thought into them the past few days:

I am the parent, what I say goes.
He can't really decide between something he knows & something he doesn't.
We can always change our minds.
And about a million other arguments both for & against me letting him have an opinion on this.

One morning I woke up & randomly had a *very* strong feeling about homeschooling.  It scared me that I suddenly wanted to pull Kman & join the homeschooling world.  I always said I would if I had to, but I was always counting on not having to.  ha.  Be careful what you say, huh?  I prayed over it, I asked several other people to pray over it, and I started doing some serious research into it.  Curriculum, co-ops, extracurriculars, ways to socialize, laws, schedule examples...  I looked into so much.  Within a week I had a very calm but intense feeling that homeschooling was the right choice.  All the stress I have been carrying for months washed off my shoulders.  (Well, other than the stress of having to tell hubby that I was sure I wanted to do this. :p)  I had no more doubts, no more worries, we'd figure this all out, even if it were just for the rest of this year.  Homeschooling doesn't have to be forever...  but it can be.  That's the great thing about freedom of education, we can try everything we need to & stick with what works until it doesn't before changing things up again.
In my head I was ready, and I wanted to pull the plug on public school soon.  I figured I'd finish out the month, take a little break to de-school, then get things started up.  Bring it on!
...then I brought it up to Kman.  I asked him what he'd think of getting to be with me (and Sweetie Pie Sparkles (SPS)) all day.  He said he'd be annoyed because SPS whines too much.  He doesn't whine all day, but totally legit.  I tried a different angle...  I reminded him of a friend that homeschools & asked if thought that would be fun, getting to be at home all day like she is.  No, he likes school (where did this come from?), plus he has to be really bad at school for his teacher to call home, but if he were with me I'd probably call his dad more easily & he'd be in big trouble.  Yet another angle, a bit more bluntly...  what if you got to do your schoolwork at home with me, and you'd have lots more time to play?  Nope.  He'd miss his teacher, he really loves his teacher.
I have since moved on to a totally different method of showing him videos of things homeschool kids do during their co-ops.  He thinks it's really cool, but he asked if he could go to a co-op one day & school the other days.  Womp. Womp. Womp.   I'm going to keep trying some with the videos.  I really wish there were some YouTube videos of kids talking to other kids about why homeschooling is great.  Maybe there are some & I haven't found them - yet.
I do think he deserves to have a say in this, even if I have final say.  Not only because he deserves a voice in his education but also because the kind of personality he has, he has to be on board or this will be a big nightmare!
This morning he woke up & asked to do some school.  (WHAT???!!  Okay!)  So I took out his handwriting book & he willingly, and happily, worked on a few lessons.  Then, I read to him while he played.  There's our writing & literature lesson for the day.  Just like that.  Now he's playing Legos, which is kinda play & education because you really have to exercise your brain for Legos.  We're going to have a short lesson about poop (yes, you read that right - all boy here!) in a bit because he wants to learn about it.  I'll probably also throw in some kind of math game on the computer.  When he's done all that & I tell him he just had a full day of school, maybe that will help him see how different, but not bad or scary or un-fun, homeschooling is.
Of course his not wanting to homeschool put doubts back into my mind.  So many fears of being able to teach him all he needs to know (but let's be real, public school is wonderful in lots of cases, but it basically teaches every kid the exact same thing with little chance of learning extras or being given one-on-one when you need it), worries of ME burning out with 2 kiddos underfoot 24/7, stresses of keeping the kiddos quiet enough for the hubby to get his work done & not add to his stress...
There's the other side though - the excitement of having freedom to go when & where we want, for learning or just for fun, the ability to alter his education around his abilities & his interests, the joy of knowing my child better than I ever imagined...
So, the summary of all these words is that I still don't know for sure what I'm doing.  I'm pretty sure I do want to homeschool.  I'm pretty sure I will homeschool (maybe I'll just start in January), but I'm still not totally sure.  I'm doubting myself, I'm uncertain of what's best for Kman, I'm worried about the hubby not being 100% on board & making things harder on him.  Basically I'm still carrying a lot of confusion around with me about this.
Time will tell, right?...

**As soon as I finished writing this, Kman showed up in the room, so we went ahead with our poop "lesson".  He kinda paid attention, but SPS was also in the room and, oh boy!  SPS was chanting "poop. poopoo, peepee, poop", and acting pretty 2-year-old-ish, Kman was not super interested because all he really wants is to go to Target & buy something, and I was frustrated because - really?  /sigh/  Could I really do this?  We did sorta get through what I wanted to.  Kman should at least know what an esophagus is now.  I guess that's something.