Saturday, February 19, 2011

Almost a month of anti-running.

I keep beating myself up on my inability to run for long periods w/out having to walk.
I keep feeling discouraged that some days I walk more of my mileage than I run.
I keep thinking I'll never be able to do this running thing well.
I remember that I just started this!
January 24th is what I'm calling my "first" day of running.  Yes, I did attempt the C25K back in November, but I failed miserably & accomplished nothing.  So, we'll just pretend I didn't do that.  ;)  On 1/24/11, I ran 2.88 miles in 47 minutes (16:16 mile/minute average).  That's not great for a runner...  but for me, the anti-runner, that was awesome!  It was awesome because I did it.  That was all that mattered that day - that I did it. 
Tomorrow will mark the 4th week of running for me.  Even though I may not be able to run even 1.5 miles straight yet, I need to stop beating myself up, feeling discouraged, & thinking I will never be able to do this.  It has ONLY been 1 month.  When I remind myself of that...  Well, I'm really not doing so bad, am I?
I've added a new tab: "mileage" to track my progress.  At one day short of 1 month into this, I've covered 28 miles.  That's 28 miles more than I ever thought I'd run.  That, my friends, is an accomplishment!

Tuesday, February 8, 2011


I completed 5K!  Well, just over 5K, at 3.61 miles.  (AFTER 3 miles on the elliptical!)
I did it despite my calves cramping, my ankles aching, & my knees fighting back.  In the moments it hurt the most, I used my stubborn attitude to refuse to let silly excuses end my goal for the day.
I've walked a few 5Ks before, but I've never run a single step in a 5K.  I am by no means ready to run a 5K race, but I met my goal today by getting through the distance.  It took me just shy of 54 minutes to do it (I'd guess I walked 15ish minutes of it total), but who cares - I did it!
The thing I'm learning about running is that it gives you the most amazing feeling of accomplishment.  It doesn't matter who motivates you before/during/after a run, who runs beside you, or what prize awaits you at the end.  Running is about YOU.  It's not a team sport, so when you accomplish a goal, it's 100% YOUR doing.  It's not something anyone can force you to do, no matter what they say to you, do for you, or bribe you with, it has to come from inside yourself.  When you're out there, it's all you.  Running is a mental thing.  I mean, obviously it's a physical thing, but it's mental.  When you tell yourself you can't do it, you can't.  But, when you tell yourself you can, YOU DO.   I'm learning to push myself harder [physically] than I've ever pushed myself before.  Running truly doesn't come easy for me, but I refuse to believe I'm not capable of doing it.  I mean, if I can bike 30 miles, why on earth couldn't I run??  My biggest obstacle is my brain.  I have always said I'm not a runner, dont' want to be a runner, can't run, won't run, don't like running...  So, guess what?  I've never been able to do it.  Well, now is the time for change!
I have GOT to figure out some way to occupy my brain when I run.  When I started & only ran about 1.5 minutes straight, I would sing the ABCs to get through it.  Now, I count in increments of 30, for 5 minutes & then start over.  I count to 30 once, count to 30 again, and then put my thumb between my index & middle fingers, to know I've passed 1 minute.  Then, I count to 30 once, count to 30 again, and put my thumb between my middle & ring fingers, etc.  It helps in some ways, I mean I'm not filling my mind with thoughts of "I can't" or "it hurts", but it starts to annoy me & then my brain is struggling to count & to tell itself to shutup.  Yep, I totally over-think it, I know.  I'm just not at a place where I can truly let my mind go & just enjoy running, it's a physical & mental struggle for me still so I have to keep something in my head.  Maybe I need to come up with a silly 5 minute long song.  ;)

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Runners' secrets

There's lots I don't know, I know that much.  That's about all I know & what I don't know is bugging me.  I am an over-planner who likes to know what to expect before it happens.  (Just ask any doctor or nurse who has had the pleasure of my requests for all the possible scenarios/types of pain/extremes of pain before I let them touch me!) 
I've learned two things so far that have blown my mind & I know there's lots more - what?  What am I missing still?  Surely these are the two most mind boggling.  Surely.
1) I had no idea that people actually completely marathons with poo running down their legs - ewwww!  Sheesh, until recently I didn't even realize that running made you need to poo.  Why wouldn't you stop & handle that though?  I can almost get it for the person in first place, but outside of that - is a PR worth THAT???  While we're at it:  peeing yourself - unintentionally - I can get.  I've had a kid, I know what happens to the bladder walls (hmmm, are they wall?).  Peeing yourself on purpose though?  Ick.  It doesn't take that long to pee, people!
2) It's normal to not wear underwear when you run.  What?  Really?  hmmmm, perhaps that poo problem would be more contained if you did...  ~giggle~  I can get that kinda, I mean they do start falling or riding up or just generally bugging you, but I'm not sure I'm ready to give them up just yet.  I mean, doesn't that cause some chaffing?
So, if you're reading this [hello???  anyone out there???], please share more secrets I need to know.