I FREAKING DID IT!!!

I completed 5K!  Well, just over 5K, at 3.61 miles.  (AFTER 3 miles on the elliptical!)

I did it despite my calves cramping, my ankles aching, & my knees fighting back.  In the moments it hurt the most, I used my stubborn attitude to refuse to let silly excuses end my goal for the day.

I've walked a few 5Ks before, but I've never run a single step in a 5K.  I am by no means ready to run a 5K race, but I met my goal today by getting through the distance.  It took me just shy of 54 minutes to do it (I'd guess I walked 15ish minutes of it total), but who cares - I did it!

The thing I'm learning about running is that it gives you the most amazing feeling of accomplishment.  It doesn't matter who motivates you before/during/after a run, who runs beside you, or what prize awaits you at the end.  Running is about YOU.  It's not a team sport, so when you accomplish a goal, it's 100% YOUR doing.  It's not something anyone can force you to do, no matter what they say to you, do for you, or bribe you with, it has to come from inside yourself.  When you're out there, it's all you.  Running is a mental thing.  I mean, obviously it's a physical thing, but it's mental.  When you tell yourself you can't do it, you can't.  But, when you tell yourself you can, YOU DO.   I'm learning to push myself harder [physically] than I've ever pushed myself before.  Running truly doesn't come easy for me, but I refuse to believe I'm not capable of doing it.  I mean, if I can bike 30 miles, why on earth couldn't I run??  My biggest obstacle is my brain.  I have always said I'm not a runner, dont' want to be a runner, can't run, won't run, don't like running...  So, guess what?  I've never been able to do it.  Well, now is the time for change!

I have GOT to figure out some way to occupy my brain when I run.  When I started & only ran about 1.5 minutes straight, I would sing the ABCs to get through it.  Now, I count in increments of 30, for 5 minutes & then start over.  I count to 30 once, count to 30 again, and then put my thumb between my index & middle fingers, to know I've passed 1 minute.  Then, I count to 30 once, count to 30 again, and put my thumb between my middle & ring fingers, etc.  It helps in some ways, I mean I'm not filling my mind with thoughts of "I can't" or "it hurts", but it starts to annoy me & then my brain is struggling to count & to tell itself to shutup.  Yep, I totally over-think it, I know.  I'm just not at a place where I can truly let my mind go & just enjoy running, it's a physical & mental struggle for me still so I have to keep something in my head.  Maybe I need to come up with a silly 5 minute long song.  ;)